【明報專訊】W.K. has written a modern poem, which means it isn't limited by patterns of rhyme (押韻) or rhythm, and it looks more like a story than a conventional poem. It does have some patterns, however, which give it a special quality. It has very short simple lines, often starting "I saw...", "I felt...", "I remembered..." or "His face...", "His eyes...", "His voice...", and so the longer lines have more impact, such as "His last breath was taken as he finished the last word". Use different sentence lengths-in poems as well as stories and articles-to keep your writing interesting and effective.
It also has a lot that is deliberately unclear: Where is the old man walking? Why does he give that advice in particular? Is it his face in the sky, or the sky's face? In a poem, it's not necessary to explain everything, it is enough to simply create images for others to think about. Don't try to explain everything in a poem-give your reader enough space to add their own understanding and meaning.